I think it has more to do with your daughter anything else. I have two sons, one is 8 and the other is 7. My 7 year old is not into sports like my 8 year old is. we bowled in a league together this summer, a non sanction, no money league. my 8 year old, has very good hand-eye coordination, is super athletic, and in all the sports he plays, loves to work at his game. ( both boys participate in golf, soccer, and bowling ). the older boys ball is drilled fingertip , while the younger's is drilled conventional. the older boy bowls two handed on his first ball, and one handed on spares . the youngest boy, likes to just play so I tried to make it as easy on him as possible. I think it mostly has to do with how your daughter views bowling at this point. let her show you how competitive she wants to be, and let her make an informed choice . I did that with my two boys and that's the direction we went. they both love to bowl, I encourage and praise both of them for what they do, and we as a family have a ton of fun. also, you mentioned the ball weight, and saying that she could probably go up from 8 to 10 pounds means to me that the extra wear and tear others are worried about on her hands should not be a problem, as long as she has some sort of good form.
these are solely my opinions and what I do with my family, so please take them as such.