Back in 1437 when I bowled you'd never see this! This ain't bowlin'!
Tell em, I also walked 40 miles one way to the bowling center in a blizzard. With no coat or shoes. I shoot 535 and let me tell you, they were really tough. Back when bowling had integrity!
Sheeeeiiiitttt, that ain't nothin. I used to have to carve my own ball, out of wood. And, and I also had to make my own pins. We didn't have any namby-pamby lane oil. We had bacon grease and was glad to get it.
Oh wait, I only started bowling 10 years ago, so I might be mistaken. My bad.
But stay off my lawn anyway...