Saw the post on "Please bring these balls back"  couldn't help but think of one that needed to stay retired.

It was 1997(?) and I was stationed in Misawa, Japan. The ball was called "The Phantom" and had a Phantom Jet on the ball somewhere. I remember it was a doo-doo brown in color and a whole ton of hoopla surrounded getting it drilled (i.e., taking lane measurements on throws, blah, blah, blah.) I went with a friend who decided to get one of them and he paid full price. Needless to say, he'd have been better off tossing a cannonball down the lanes. My friend had bowled since he was seven and was throwing an original pirhana. He GAVE me the ball after just one week. I threw it into the ocean after bowling one league with it - Then again, I was still using two fingers and chucking the ball like those annoying middle school kids at the local Cosmic Bowl.  

Somewhere off the coast of Japan lies the final resting place of "The Phantom"
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I'm not a pro ... but I play one on TV!

Columbia 300 Chaos
Hammer Striking Red Offset 3-D (the 3-DUD)
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White Dot
Chocolate is cheaper than therapy and you don't need an appointment.

For me it has been.
Pacific Storm
Champ

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Proud member of the one and only NATION!

Ti-Messenger. I couldn't get that ball to do squat. I saw many people who loved it. I believe I might have had a manufacturers defect. I gave it away for a round of drinks for my team. I couldn't stand to look at it anymore.

My other would be the Hammer 3-D, the burgundy (it was almost pink). Not enough hook and not enough roll. Really not enough of anything.

But my number one is the Ti-Messenger. That one is in my ulcer.
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When the tide of life is against you, and the current upsets your boat, don't waste those tears on what might have been, just lay on your back and float!