So I've recently joined "AA" (assholes anonymous) because I've realized I have a problem.  I'm an asshole, as many of you have gathered and pointed out.  I've come to terms with this and have accepted that I need to change.  How does this relate to my topic?  Well I recently quit my summer "PBA Experience" league.  I got rather frustrated last week and decided instead of putting myself in situations where I know I'm going to get pissy, even if I know it's just me being overly sensitive, I'm going to do what they universally say to do to work on things and just keep myself away from situations that I know will set me off. 

I love bowling, probably too much.  I'm really into it, I'm competitive, and I'm a purist.  I don't really like bowling in the summer, but that's the only time they offer this league, so I've decided I needed to support it.  Normally there's some of the city's "big guns" that bowl, and some college bowlers that come bowl.  However, this year, there's none of that, and in fact, it's the opposite.  First of all, there are exactly 10 bowlers in the league.  There are two bowlers that are literally mentally handicapped, one of whom isn't aware enough to practice lane courtesy.  They can't even average 130 on a house shot.  There's another older guy who throws a backup ball, who during the year bowls 5 leagues and keeps a composite average updated after every set and whose dream is to win a senior PBA title before he dies.  His highest average for a single season in his life is 179.  There are two people in the league who average over 200, everybody else averages around 180 on a house shot and are basically beginners.  I'm everyone's "pro shop guy," so I'm constantly being asked for ball and laneplay advice.  Would this bother a normal person?  Maybe, maybe not.  But this is the only time I get to really challenge myself and really focus and learn some stuff, but all that happens is I spend the night getting lane jumped, yelling when they get strikes, and there's a constant line of people wanting ball advice or coaching and I just can't get focused on bowling.  It's bad enough in league during the winter, but at least it's a house shot.  There was no point in bowling, and I'm sure the hardasses will get on here and say, "well, maybe if you had a better mental game," or "stop crying and deal with it," but you just can't get any good practice or work done when you're being constantly interrupted, and I'm not there to drink and hang out.  I'm there to get some work done, it helps a lot with my coaching and work in the pro shop.  Yes, I'm sure it could have helped my patience, but being that I'm not there to work on patience . .

Gizmo,

You stated in another post that bowling needs a lot of help.  But here you have the chance to be an ambassador to the game and you don't want to do it.  I mean I get it, you're bowling and these distractions are just that distractions.  Instead of quitting, why not help these people learn the game?  I would simply tell them that you'd be more than willing to "help" them with lane play or ball layouts or whatever the case may be either before or after bowling is done.  And the people that aren't using lane courtesy, teach them how it's done.

If this is truly you're center (pro shop) or whatever, lending a hand will do nothing but give you a great repor with the customers which would drive sales.  I don't think quitting is the answer, after all it is just a 10 person summer league.  You have the opportunity to build relationships with these people, and whether you like it or not that's good for business and the game. What would this game be without building relationships with people, and where would people be in this game without someone teaching them how the game is played.  Who cares if the members don't average high enough to be a "big gun" they obviously enjoy the game.  By not helping and just quitting, doesn't that just turn people away from the game?  Doesn't the game need these people?  Like I've stated before 90% of all bowlers average under 180

Maybe the "big guns" and college bowlers found out you were in the league and didn't want to bother you so they dropped out.  I think the fix for your dilemma is start the first one person league in USBC history. This way you can put out whatever shot you think is "pure" and only use "pure" equipment like rubber.

Thank you for not getting the point.

Gizmo,

You stated in another post that bowling needs a lot of help.  But here you have the chance to be an ambassador to the game and you don't want to do it.  I mean I get it, you're bowling and these distractions are just that distractions.  Instead of quitting, why not help these people learn the game?  I would simply tell them that you'd be more than willing to "help" them with lane play or ball layouts or whatever the case may be either before or after bowling is done.  And the people that aren't using lane courtesy, teach them how it's done.

If this is truly you're center (pro shop) or whatever, lending a hand will do nothing but give you a great repor with the customers which would drive sales.  I don't think quitting is the answer, after all it is just a 10 person summer league.  You have the opportunity to build relationships with these people, and whether you like it or not that's good for business and the game. What would this game be without building relationships with people, and where would people be in this game without someone teaching them how the game is played.  Who cares if the members don't average high enough to be a "big gun" they obviously enjoy the game.  By not helping and just quitting, doesn't that just turn people away from the game?  Doesn't the game need these people?  Like I've stated before 90% of all bowlers average under 180

Well, you make a good point, and I understand what you're getting at.  I help and I help and I help, but I never get a chance to enjoy the game or to get any better.  That's why most of the guys in our pro shop "chain" don't bowl anymore.  We can't ever just go out and bowl, if we're in a bowling center, we might as well be on the clock.  It would be like your work calling you and constantly talking about work business after you've clocked out and are at a ball game, or doing something with your kids.  When I go to the bowling alley to watch my kid bowl, it doesn't really happen because I end up talking to this person or that person.  When I bowl, I'm always answering questions.  So yes, you make a great point that I should help people as much as possible, and I do, but sometimes you just have to say no, and I'm choosing to say no this summer. 

Even worse is that the pro shop isn't my day job, I already have a 40 a weeker, and the pro shop work might as well be the rest of my time.  I literally can't bowl at all without being asked to coach or asked about equipment.  I'll give it some thought though, I don't bowl again until Thursday, and I can always tell them I won't quit, but I'm getting so burnt out on it.  People ask questions and want coaching, but when you give them the answers and tell them what to do, they don't want to do it your way, they want an easy, quick, no effort answer for everything.  Maybe patience is really what I need to learn, but I might as well just quit caring about my own bowling, because it's just not going to happen.  That might be what I need to learn out of this, because that's the source of the frustration.  I like actually bowling almost as much as I like coaching and being in the shop, but there's gotta be a way to find some separation there.  I'll think some more, thanks. 

Stress in any shape or form has to be handled so as to give you some relief, somewhere along the line. If it isn't, then the most enjoyable form of work becomes a task, a job that becomes not only no fun, but stress. Stress, if not "put into its own corner" shortens your life, just like too much fat and cholesterol.

Get away from the cause of the stress, in any way you can; so that you can return to what makes life worth living for you.

Storm making it rain got it right. Take an appointment book and make appointments for the people that want to pay you to coach them.  Tell the ones that want layout advice to come by the proshop the next day while you are there and you will hook them up. Be nice be consistent and turn the situation in your favor.

Ther are definitely plusses to bowling in the small pba league.

Thanks for all the replies.  This honestly wasn't something where I posted only looking for answers I wanted to hear, because perception as a whole is what I was after.  Everybody has some good points from some different points of view.  I thought about it quite a bit more and actually further understood something I already understood.  Like I said earlier, a lot of the guys in my pro shop "chain" don't bowl anymore, a lot of guys I know that are in the industry either don't bowl league, or just don't bowl period.  Bottom line is that if you love the game, don't get involved in the business of it, because I'm 7 years in now, about to start year 8 in August, and you just honestly can't fully devote yourself to both sides, especially if you have a family and a full time job "on the side." 

But there's another side to it.  My "boss" at the shop doesn't bowl period, hasn't in a couple years.  He's full time in the shop, it's his career, but he just can't bowl and enjoy it, because it's just another 3 hours of being on the clock without getting paid per league.  People either hound him, or when he isn't bowling great, they'll tease him about needing to pay himself for a lesson, etc, and it's bad enough when people come in and buy a Raptor Talon and then wonder why it's not turning sideways on a dry 35 ft pattern and then think HE did something wrong.  HOWEVER, since he doesn't bowl, since he's not really visible, there's a lot of people that know me better than they know him and so they come to me just because they know me, not because I'm any better.  Bottom line is that we still get the business, but he's there a lot more than I am, so it would be a lot more convenient for people to go see him. 

spmcgivern brings up a really good point though that a lot of people not in the business don't realize, when you're so busy helping everybody else and answering questions and coaching, when you actually get up to throw a shot, you almost just get up there and chuck it to get it out of the way so you can go back to business.  All the sudden if the pro shop guy who you're going to for coaching and help is barely shooting 600s, what kind of doubt does that put in your mind?  If you haven't had to deal with the constant questions and interruptions before, you don't know how it affects your concentration or relaxation.  It affects everything from your ability to keep up with transition, to making moves, to even just making shots.  Starting to realize why people in the industry don't bowl much.  Number one it's tricky to do, number two, because it's tricky to do, it hurts your credibility if you aren't able to put up numbers or look impressive on the lanes.  I could ramble more, but those are the basic points. 

Tonight is league night and I still haven't decided yet . .

I understand it can be a pain, sort of like the first week or two for league secretaries  - tons of interruptions between shots.  But how much concentration do you need?  Do you seriously need to concentrate the entire 5 minutes between shots?  You should only need to focus once you step on the lane getting ready to make your next shot.  Once you step up, forget everyone else, concentrate for 5 seconds and throw your best shot.  I may not be in the business, but why can't it be that simple?