You have to think, "let it go" don't grab it. If you watch on TV, you will here PDW tell himself that all of the time. Relax your thumb and tell yourself that and then don't grab it, let it roll naturally off of your thumb. If the fit is right, it will come off at the wrong time. If it is wrong, a good driller will be able to adjust it for you, by either loosening or tightening the hole, or adjusting the forward or reverse pitch.
Once you get the fit right, you will have trouble bowling with a ball that does not fit correctly.
BTW, I have often been told to that you must apply the slightest grip pressure with your thumb, like holding a baby bird. If you do this, remember, the pressure should apply from the inside edge (right edge) of your thumb, and should stay the same from the start of your approach until the ball is released. In other words, the ball should still roll naturally off of your thumb and then fingers. You should not have to "think" and tell yourself to let it go because you are holding it so tight. If you do, you are squeezing the ball to tight with your thumb.
Last, for some, it helps to "hook" your finngers in, holding them firm. This will help to hold the ball, longer if you seem to be dropping it or releasing it early. Again, the ball should still roll off of the fingers.
One of the benefits of drilling your own balls is that you can really make slight adjustments until you get things perfect.
Good luck.
CC
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Those that can do. Those that can't complain. Pimpin ain't easy, but it's mandatory.
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