I don't have much time to reply to this, but wow.  First of all, I don't know how my situation with the black lady last year sickened you . .  I was trying to go out of my way to make sure I didn't offend her by just flat out demanding the money because of the race difference, I didn't want to get into it, and I was trying to find out the best way to go about it.  

I know what you meant by ignorance, sometimes people take that as a harsher comment than need be.  Something you said about the college coach . .  Doesn't it ever get old to have people constantly going out of their way to almost patronize you just because of the race difference?  Isn't it just like being treated like a little kid?  The general opinion that I've gotten is that it's not received well at all.  I don't come into contact with a lot of black people at bowling alleys, but I DO at my jobs and at school.  The majority of people I've worked with have been black, and we've had PLENTY of racial discussions.  Are the only people that can make the jokes or treat other people normally all minorities?  Is it not ok for me as a white guy to just walk up to you and start talking like we're two normal people?  I'm not threatened by black people at all, and in fact, I'd rather be around black people.  Dead honestly, it just seems like a big family.  White people can walk by each other on the street and turn a cold shoulder to everybody, but black people will at least make eye contact, smile, say hi, etc.  If it comes to tv, I'd rather watch things like Comic View, Dave Chappelle, Fresh Prince, Steve Harvey show, etc.  My black supervisor was just making fun of me the other day because I don't watch Seinfeld . .  "What?  You're a white guy that doesn't watch Seinfeld?"  

But basically my point is that I don't understand, and a lot of black people I work with don't understand why we have to force things, and why is there such a big deal about something so simple and stupid.  My comment about the black bowlers that just hook the piss out of things was out of left field, and I probably shouldn't have said it, but like others were quick to point out, it was a comment made in ignorance.  I'll let all the minorities do the debating about why there aren't any on tour or very few that golf.  If I turn on the show one of these days and see a black guy on there, I'm not gonna make a national newsday about it.  "Oh look, everybody come see!  There's a BLACK guy bowling on tv!"  I don't care.  He's a person that bowled well that week and earned it, why make it such a big deal?  Kelly Kulick is exempt.  Same thing.  I don't care.  She bowled well, she made it, this is such a big deal why?  

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AChappy texted me earlier at work and told me that I really needed to read and chime in on this thread and see what you wrote.  When I did about 20 minutes ago, my jaw literally hit the keyboard and I couldn't believe what you just wrote and thought it was a complete and geniune assesment of an entire race of people.  It did take me awhile to gather my opinions together and refrain from lashing out in pure anger but this is probaly the most absurd thing I've ever seen you write up(and I've seen alot and let all of it go).  The incident last summer where you asked for help with dealing with an irrate "black woman" as a customer was pretty sickening to hear, but that's long gone and I don't want to bring up the past as I believe you learned something positive out of all the responses you've received and I don't feel it's an issue anymore.  However, it is your prothetic opinion in this matter, further backed by a generalized stereotype that grosses me out.  It sounds a bit overdramatic but I couldn't sleep if I did not respond to this thread.

First, I'll start with the initial article, which I assume was about Fero Williams of Team USA fame and his success in the Amatuer ranks.  Of course when anyone has success in anything their race will always play a part of it.  Sure, it's the politically correct thing to say when people say:

"Oh, I have no problem with black people at all, I just want to point out that..."
"...I actually have a few close friends that are black"
"He's probaly the the best black guy I've ever seen do (x-activity)"

...but it's these connotations that lead people like myself to believe that you are subconsciously threatened by black people for whatever reason and feel the need to conjuer up statements like these to put yourself in a safe area.  Why does it irritate you so much, the article that is?  Is it really because you want to see all races equal as one or is it just your opinions sprouting out in a subconscious matter as if to say, just because he's black why does he get this type of article?  Now it sounds like I'm pointing the finger, but that's because in part I am, and I never would have said anything else in this thread if it weren't for the above post.  It almost reminds me of the discussions by whites of:

"Why is there a black entertainment television(B.E.T.) channel?  There's no white entertainment television(W.E.T.)!!"

Well if you sat back and thought about it for a minute and scrolled through the now hundreds and hundreds of channels, you'd see that the majority of T.V. is "W.E.T.".  Yeah, it's been played on as a joke by many, and it's not a big deal to me, but I'm just throwing in an analogy to make people think about what it actually is that you're saying.

AChappy made an excellent post of all of the great black bowlers in America that you'd be able to see if you weren't so sheltered in Kansas City.  Although that's a very large city in America, and you do admit to having little exposure to black people, I can't help but to believe that your concept of blacks are limited to racial stereotypes which are portrayed in any venue of media and entertainment.  I have tons of friends of all nationalities where I might be their only black friend(and that's mostly through bowling), and through intelligent conversation back and forth they have expressed to me how actually getting to know someone has broken down any misconception or stereotypical view they might have had in the past.  I'd like to say that I don't think you're entirely wrong for feeling the way you do based on your limited exposure, but you are just a little ignorant of racial matters.  When I say ignorant, I'm not saying stupid, I'm just using it's definition in saying that you don't know any better.

But when you make statements like these, it is not only hurtful to people like myself who are sometimes naive enough to believe that we are in 2006 now and racial views and relations are at an all time best, but it can really twist your words into making people beleive that you are some sort of closet racist.

Before I end this long post I'd like to share a story of an esteemed college coach who came up to my team during my senior year season where we had a 6 man team of 5 black kids and one white kid(who did not start, btw) and these were his exact words:

"You know, I have been watching you guys for the past 4 years and I cannot stress how inspired I am by your team and the level of professionalism and respect that you guys give to the great game of bowling. Plus the fact that you all stayed in school to earn your degrees is such a wonderful acheivement and I am very proud of you all."

While this initially touched me at first and it really was a kind and heartfelt gesture, I couldn't help but think, "If we were all white would he have said the same thing to us?  There are 25-30 other teams here and he came down from 5 pairs to watch us finish our last game.  What about the other guys?"

I hope you can take all of this and really learn some empathy in how you express your feelings.  Even in trying to say something positive, there can definately be negative feelings felt by yours words by others who are different than you.  I respect your honesty, but a person definately has to be told that they are wrong when they are.
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- DP3
Hoss Central Inc.
Respect the Game


Edited on 8/15/2006 10:46 PM

Edited on 8/15/2006 10:50 PM

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New member of the Metal Militia!!!  If you think Simple Plan is metal, then you must die.  And not get to be a member . .\m/!!!