You
do want to punish him to let him know it's not ok, but don't take away his favorite thing, especially one that can get him a scholarship. Like BK said, have a talk with him. You'd be suprised how open us teens can be. Nobody gives us a chance.
Like I said though, don't punish him too harshly. I know that if my parents ever banned me from bowling, I would NOT be prevented from doing anything bad, I'd bet ANYTHING that'd I'd become even worse and do much more. Not to mention the fact I would hate my parents with a passion and our relationship would be torn up. So I don't think you want that to happen.
Also, you said you want to get him counseling. Only do this if he has done something like this before, but I don't know if he has. If you send him to counseling, what message will that give him if it's only the one time? It will say "I think you're screwed up and need help". Not being offensive, but teens tend to think the same way when it comes to parents, and that's how I'd feel. But unless he's done a bunch of other bad things, then you shouldn't. If he has, though, that's another story.
No offense, but since you're dealing with a teen, many people here won't understand like me, BK and King will. We're going through this kind of stuff right now, and we know what goes on at school.
But step number 1: Have a talk. That's the best thing to do right now.
And if someone argues with me about this post saying I'm wrong, that will prove my point that adults cannot think of how teens react and think about situations.
Hope this helps. If not, can I have his stuff?
EDIT: BTW, where did he get the alcohol from?
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-Andy
Edited on 5/15/2004 12:03 PM