LOL Brian - you got it right the first time.
Seriously - this kind of question is the type that you guys can't answer.
Michelle, I run into the "plastic up the middle" in city, state, and WIBC tournaments. It is one of those lane conditions I fear most - because it's completely unreadable. In fact, just before I left for WIBC last year, a local touring pro told me to pray that I didn't follow that kind of bowler in any event at the stadium.
My strategy on this type of condition is to pull out the most aggressive thing I can find, use an aggressive release, and get in deeper than most women.
I have no idea if this is a line your wife might find comfortable, but I like it.
Here's my overall game strategy - when I'm playing with the guys, I tend to stay outside most of them. When I'm playing with the women, I get inside most of them. That way there are fewer folks messing with my shot. Of course, I don't really care if I have to play 4th arrow or 1st...Whatever gets the job done. Outside those boundaries is a bit tough for me.