Charlest explains this best but extender polishes have slip agents in them to help it get down lane...
Cleaning it on a spinner and adding step 2 polish usually tames any ball down for me..
don't really know if it needs cleaned...it doesn't even have 5 games on it yet...but i will wait and see if he provides me with some help and go from there...thanks for your input so far
I'd ask first, "how deep are you playing?"
The wrecker normally allows (sometimes even forces) many people to play fairly deep on lighter house patterns. 4th arrow is not unusual. If you still can't get it through the heads if you're already playing deep, then the first thing I would suggest is to use a milder ball or putting as fine a surface on the ball as possible (sanding with 1000, 2000, then 4000 grit pads and then use a strong abrasive polish, like Storm's Xtra Shine).
I wouldn't suggest using a slip agent (some extender polishes does not have a slip agent in them; just a stronger abrasive), unless you have no milder ball AND are pretty sure this is going to be the condition from here on out.
If all that is true, some good slip agent polishes are Valentino's UFO, Neo-Tac's Control-It, and Powerhouse's Delayed Reaction. Be aware that slip agents work by reducing the oil absorbing ability of the resin coverstock, as well as putting a high gloss polish on the ball. UFO's slip agent is organic and is worn off over the course of about 25 games. It can be removed by means of mild abrasive like 2000 grit or 4000 grit pad. The slip agent in the other two is more permanent, and can be removed by means of a thorough sanding, like 500 or 1000 grit pads.